Sunday, October 25, 2009

WHERE ARE THEY NOW; THE MISSING MUSICIAN EDITION

I was thinking about some of the singers that made a blip on the map and then just as quickly as they came they disappeared. You know it takes more than just having talent to sing you have to have a work ethic, plus a drive to want it, and a willingness to do it by whatever means, and let us not forget you need a management team that will saturate the market and be about getting you out there to the masses ad nauseum plus it kind of works against you when your record company folds, or your group disbands, or you simply just didn't have what it took to make a lasting musical impression, but everyone that gets a music deal will simply not go on to become music legends you have to know your product, and if you are your product then you have to know if you are long term or fly by night. Some people making music now guaranteed won't be making music still in 2012 you won't even remember them unless you come across their video on youtube if that site is even still around in 2012. The music game is a cold hard mistress and she will love and leave that ass in a heartbeat just ask any musician who has been in the trenches for awhile. People are all starry-eyed and naive when it comes to making music and those who don't have a head for business while making sure that they protect themselves while in the music biz they will get done by the music industry and they will be left bitter and broken disillusioned and angry. The music biz is paved on the backs of one hit wonders and acts that never got out of the starting block.

Lets go through some of the people that the music biz has left behind in its tracks:

Dear Monifah where are you? Have you found the Lord, did you get married and push out babies? Where did you go come back home we miss you!


Dear Gina Thompson are you some where selling ass? Cracked out? Bitter and trying to stab puff pastry in the club if you see him? What you should do is stand outside of Bad Boy's new york office with a sign and a cup begging for spare change with a sign that says "I used to be on bad boy records this is your future!"




Dear Tweet you should have capitalized on the name twitter its too late now sucks, I bought both your albums...are you still over there singing back up and waiting for your big next wave of interest to many years have passed I hope you got some kind of knowledge or at least a deal working for someone that will allow you to put food on the table but as long as Missy let you carry her hats with hair attached to them you shall never go hungry.





Dear Truth Hurts, I always thought your jawbone was extra strong is that from using it excessively? Your album sucked donkey balls when I bought that shit it just pretty much summed up my day from there, that day will forever be marred in my mind by bad memories I don't even remember the dude I was with that day but he was a fail and my mind is blocking the memory thank God your album was like a bad cheeseburger the only thing that saved my day was a burger king burger that is the only bright spot I remember. I hope you at least got some section 8 housing because I remember you were trying to get your sister out of the foster care system. BTW the Indian video and beat you jacked for this song was hotter than what you tried to do here but I understand when you in a hurry to hit the music scene and make you a quick buck anything will do you should have tried a pyramid scheme like mona-vee but on the upside you made winding your body hot so big ups for that.



Dear NLT that is managed by Marcus Houston and Chris St(p)okes you might want to rethink your whole approach basically you sound way to R&B'ish but you're just coming off zesty all those intense faces you're making in the video makes my bowels lock up and its just not a good look. This is your 2nd single and...yea who really knows you? Your fan base is still small and you are in danger of being exploited and/whored by the marketing team of TUG and then what? Will it porn for you as well? Think about it, where's B2K, even Omarion you need to look at these peoples track record don't say I didn't try and warn you...



Dear Soul For Real I know that you have recently all been locked up with the exception of one of y'all that's sad. I know its hard to bounce back from having a little success and now being broke and doing credit fraud no one ever gives the artist a "what to do when you don't quite break out and be a successful act like they promised you act", don't worry Monifah is pissed off too maybe in jail you will come up with ways to still be relevant please don't drop the soap, watch each others back.



Dear Bilal I was digging you, are you some where wondering around under a bridge singing melodies only you can hear? Did you smoke up all your advancement money? Oh brother where art thou? OR are you hiding out some where because you believed your own hype turned into some sort of afrocentric love guru and tried to start your own tribe by knocking up all the "soul sistas" you could find hyping them by telling them you were going to start a cultural revolution, told them they should hold you down but you turned out to be some ole jive ass cultural pimp who is in turn a deadbeat daddy with leagues of children you don't take care of and now you some where living off a YT women who "believes" in you. You always did give me that sort of vibe I hope it hasn't come down for you like that but if it has damn shame on you. (UPDATE) Dear Bilal I now understand why you sat the fuck down from being on the music scene you can't sing worth shit. I can verify this because you were the one snag in the wonderful night that was the maxwell concert, you raped my soul with your damn caterwauling You have been found out and I'm spreading the word gone and go back to doing whatever else you were doing and shit besides singing because singing is not your calling!



Dear Subway you should have trademarked your name and inked a deal to sing all of subway sandwiches commercials you could have been filthy rich by now, instead you some where sitting in a subway bitter as hell or either you living with Michael Bivins in his who's who has been mansion for wayward used up talent aka the Biv 10 artist.



Dear Allure...Le-sigh I can't, I hope you ladies managed to find ballers, or got married or at least got a baby daddy check coming in.



Dear Next is it true you all fell out because of super head? Now you all sitting at the house sad and shit, you weren't without talent now look at you. Le-sigh Bro's before Hoes next time!



Dear Isyss, I liked this song, never bought an album though, and probably won't buy one but thanks for this song.



Hey Jesse Powell what you doing where you at? I really loved the song You, after that you just kind of fell off what happened? Did they try and fuck you over your contract? Where you not sexy enough to make it mainstream? I mean you a little shorty with a bird chest but you could sing your ass off I wouldn't fuck you but you could sing to me on a regular basis and I would feed you and slide you some snack cakes so you could get your weight up a little bit. I'm just saying but thanks for this lovely song that will forever live in our memories.



Uncle Sam hey where are you? Are you bitter and mad at the industry and shit like everyone else that used to sing and got dropped after they did a couple singles? I mean I liked your song but maybe you better off where ever you are right now. I mean you did really look like someones uncle so I mean are you running a daycare, or maybe an after school program helping the wayward kids and shit out in your neighborhood now perhaps you are providing music lessons and shit. Did you move to Iceland? What's good withcu uncle sam if you google yourself and see this post hollar at me leave me a comment because I really am interested in what your doing now a days.



Hey Az Yet, damn Laface records fucked up everybody hope y'all made a little change cause ummm yea this was the jam but damn where did y'all go? I hope y'all writing songs are at least working in somebody mail room...Do y'all still talk to babyface cause he ain't really putting out no music either maybe y'all can hook up and do like a traveling music show and put on a Laface revival musical it could be great get Toni B in there and just make it a well rounded show I'd go see it maybe if y'all give me like some comp tickets since I did come up with this brilliant little idea for y'all it's the least y'all could do.



Hey guys from Shai where y'all at and shit I mean I know Garfield was at cal state northridge taking classes and what not but what else y'all doing? What happened to your flannel outfits and baggy jeans do you still have them outfits? Do you ever take em out the closet and just be like damn I used to sing what happened? Is Garfield the only one that went and got a degree? Lawd how many of y'all had a crush on Garfield? light skinned dudes had a good run didn't they!!! (LOL)





I think you get the gist of where I'm going with this but if y'all see an old musical act or have any info on them leave it in the comment section cause I care about these people in my own way and I just want to make sure that they alright and not singing up under the freeway or worst. Hell if the girl from family matters can get her 5 minutes of fame back then let these one hit wonders be great as well. I'm just saying let's remember them in their short lived glory hey day and keep your eyes peeled you never know who might be working at your local walmart and shit.