Monday, August 02, 2010


With several of the long time shacking up celeb-whore-t's getting married these past couple of months it got me to thinking why did it take so long for these couples to make it down the aisle and then it dawned on me the women in these relationships where older than their male counterparts several years older in fact. They got these dudes when they were young and had to essentially wait until the dudes grew up and were actually ready for marriage even though they had shacked up for awhile. I guess in a young cats mind playing house and actually giving a woman his last name is two different animals. I'm not pointing fingers nor laying blame this is just my Ah-Ha moment which led me to this post which led me to really give some thought to the Pre-Cougar Rules.

Now If you're already a Cougar then you already know the rules if not you will soon learn them if you are a pre-cougar and you are still trying to navigate the murky waters of being with a younger man then allow me to break it down for you the way I have come to see it.

The Disclaimer: This is how I seeing it breaking down for me if you know some other rules or if I leave anything out please feel free to let me know thanks.

Definition to me of a Pre-Cougar: A woman who is 28-35 that is attracted too or attracts nothing but younger men

A Regular Cougar: 36+

The Break Down Age wise Males:

18-21: These boys are mannish and they talk a great deal of shit. Now don't be fooled by the baby faces and the bird chest some of these y.a.t's* got their start by lying about their ages from the jump when they were 14 they were lying and saying they were 16, when they were 16 they were lying saying they were 18 etc, you see the pattern. These youngsters are in it to win it they go hard in the paint being with older women is their bread and butter, sometimes they are users, sometimes older women are what they are geniunly attracted too, and sometimes more often than not they are looking for a mother replacement. You have to tread lightly in this category but of course a guy this young is not looking for anything serious he might stay around longer than usual if he has it extremely good, ie a playstation, a place to lay his head, a car to drive, hot home cooked meals, and plenty sex, these things will keep the y.a.t* interested and loyal for a minute but eventually he will get bored, and he will get itchy feet and that's when the trouble starts up. So pre-cougars remember this age group is fun to play with but they aren't keepers, they are best for their stamina, hard-dick, and play time only.

22-25: Usually they are still mannish but since they have some road mileage on them by this age they are a little bit smarter, and their mouth game has been tried and tested which means they can take shit and turn it into cake and having you eating it out the palm of their hands, they know the right things to say including the marriage spill.  Now with these guys they will talk a good game and you might have a slim chance of marriage if you're looking for that but don't expect to date for a year and then start planning your wedding, you will either have to wait and see if he is sincere, which usually translates into waiting until he grows up if he stays around that long and you usually do this if you have the time to wait, in that waiting period you might end up with kids if you want them, and still no wedding but if your biological clock is ticking and you just want kids then this age bracket is your best bet. If you get a good y.a.t* then hopefully he has some schooling under his belt, a degree, a skill set other than being a rapper or producer, and if he has some hustle in him then he will take care of his kid(s) and it will be what it will be.

26-29: Now usually about this time the bloom for the y.a.t's* has faded a little bit but if they are hardcore attracted to older women they they will be setting their sights on women 36 and up, or they have aged while with their older women and now they are seriously ready to walk down that aisle, and within this age bracket they usually more or less have their shit together besides if you raised him since he was a cub he's already broken in, you've put in time and energy into him and this is when the pay off comes, they are more focused and they know what they want and they are trying to settle down and actually build a household.

Now there may be an exceptions to the rule every now and again but for the most part the break down  is pretty much standard in my opinion now if you know different then you are welcome to hit me up especially if you know something I don't or if you think I have missed a vital piece of info but other wise feel free to use this guide in your pre-cougar start up and happy and wise hunting.

*Y.A.T.: "Young And Tender" or "Young And Tasty" whichever you prefer. IF you're going to use my phrase just give me a shout out or link me thanks.