Tuesday, April 08, 2014


I don't know if anyone watches the Mary Mary show I know I don't but I can't escape the talk of Tina's husband cheating on her and not just once but apparently repeatedly. Trying to forgive someone for cheating once is tough but when the person keeps adding insult to injury by telling you he has cheated multiple times and he keeps telling you not once but stretching the telling of said infidelities over a span of time you don't get a chance to heal because he keeps heaping hurt after hurt on you. My heart goes out to Tina because she is in real pain and enduring it on television. I don't think I could do that, I don't think I could have the whole world watch me be in pain as my "husband" keeps telling me he's a serial cheater. I don't have that much christianity in me to not pistol whip his ass on tv.

I think one of the worst things you can do to someone is cheat please note I said ONE not the only thing. There are plenty other horrible things that people do but right now I'm discussing cheating. I've watched what that kind of pain does to a person I've seen it just break a person down until they are so bitter and jaded that they just don't even deal with the pain. They ignore it, they funnel it into other things they just don't even care anymore so emotionally they are just numb. You ever seen a person living on autopilot or being angry and bitter? Which seeps into everything you touch you wear it like a piece of clothing it changes you and it harms everything around you. There is someone you know right now that is angry and bitter because of a relationship she's the single mother crying at night, or withholding child visitation  because she is mad at the father, she is the women in church who's been married multiple times and can't figure out why her marriages don't work out, she's the married mother who lashes out at her sons because they look like their father and angry at her girls because she feels like they choose daddy over momma.  You know people who have been touched by infidelity you know people who have done the cheating, and you know people that have been the cheaties.

When you cheat it is not just about you and your side piece (which is a stupid fucking term, the only thing you should be adding sides to is food entrees) cheating does not happen in a vacuum you think it doesn't affect anything or anyone around you but you're wrong. You are stealing, you are lying, you are doing emotional harm to another and you are wielding this knife selfishly because you don't have the courtesy to stay single and just "date." If you feel like you can't handle monogamy then don't get in a relationship, just have multiple sex partners and fuck your brains out don't drag someone else into your situation because you think you want a place holder. Someone you can always come back to just so you can have a consistent face in the mix or someone in your bed on cold nights when your other fuck buddies can't be found. Don't be an asshole who does that sort of thing.

In 2k14 no one, I repeat no one should be cheating why is that even a lifestyle choice? Why would you even check that box off in your life? Why would you intentionally inflict pain on another human being that you are supposed to care about? Why would you willingly break up your home for some sex? If you are no longer in love or want to be where you are then the best thing to do in the long run is leave. Yes there are difficult conversations that have to be had especially if you are married if you are no longer happy and couples therapy isn't working, if the pastor can't fix it, if you can't go to God and get help then leave because you're already gone in your heart and head. Don't wait until you are just totally checked out so once you do leave you already hooking up or getting with someone else as soon as you leave. That looks and feels insincere now the other person is asking themselves did so and so really love me? How can they leave me and get in another relationship so quickly? Be respectful you're free now give the other person the one that got emotionally sucker punched some time to grieve. Don't just flaunt your happy be delicate at least. I know this will read like greek to most because cheating is the new new and plenty people are indulging in it and flaunting it like cheap jewelry but you don't have to be that person. Be different be a trojan horse and pick your own course don't just follow the crowd.

Hence forth take this motto into the world and sprinkle it everywhere you go; Cheating is a choice, I don't choose it, stop wounding others emotionally, stop being a time thief, stop being a liar, and stop robbing people of their choices, do better because you know better.

I am well aware that I can't force my beliefs and morality on someone else but if I give one person pause before they pull that emotional trigger. If I can get someone to see that their actions do inflict pain on another then it's a good thing. Maybe that one will tell another and so forth and so on. Everyone has a choice and at the end of the day you have to live with the consequences of your own actions and if you can sleep at night without feeling like shit then I guess you  made the right choice, or you're just emotionally stunted and don't care about emotions and that's a whole other kettle of fish but I digress.

Thanks for reading and until next time.........