Sunday, April 03, 2011


Is your moral compass broken?

Infidelity, living in the grey, broken moral compass, living in denial, avoiding the truth, sticking your head in the sand, turning a blind eye, putting up a facade, fronting, lying, cheating, stealing, etc I've never been attracted to any of these particular qualities. I never even indulged in any of these qualities because the plain truth of the matter is everyone around me has always used them excessively their characters are built on these shaky foundations. The only thing I could ever do is cling to the truth, the unpopular, stringent, hurtful, but necessary truth. I've even gotten in trouble when I was younger for telling the unmitigated truth because it caused friction in church social groups but as a teenager you aren't supposed to carry what you hear to the parties being discussed that is what they call getting into grown folks business it also gets you labeled as a troublemaker and then the blackballing starts but lessons learned are character builders. Now when I know something I keep it to myself and just shake my head or better yet when someone tunes their mouths up to start talking about something I don't wish to hear I walk away out of earshot.

 I truthfully don't wish to be any ones confidant I don't like secrets, I don't do lying, and I can get in trouble all by myself I don't need anyone to help me do that. The less I know about your sordid affairs the happier I am, I'm not the girlfriend who loves the sordid details and don't expect me especially to root for you when you're sleeping with someone else's man or husband/wife or woman I might not say what I really want to say to you because people are grown and they make choices, but here's what you can't do with me, you can't cry on my shoulder about how much you love someone else's spouse and expect me to comfort you and tell you it will get better, you can't ask me to help you plot out how to get him away from his current so he or she can be all yours, and you can't ask me to come to any type of function that you throw for this said man/woman like they are yours exclusively and you will most likely notice that I am distant and we don't hang out like we used to and the phone calls have gone down to none and you can't figure out why its because you're doing something I can't support plain and simple. I know people might say well that's not a friend, but sometimes you have to love people from a distance especially when they are willingly and willfully doing something that is hurtful or harmful to themselves and others. I can't be a witness to your self destruction and some people honestly think there is no harm in cheating if you don't see anything wrong with it then we are already at a crossroads but if you get to rock bottom and you feel like you need help getting back on track then call me up, but until then it best that I love you from a distance. If you want to live in a bubble where you can pretend that your actions don't effect others then so be it but you should also keep your own counsel stop trying to bring others into that dysfunctional twisted bubble you call life that's not fly and its not right but I digress.

I said all that to say if you deal from a place of truth even when its painful you will have no choice but to make decisions based off the truth. If you force yourself to see things clearly as they are and not as you wish them to be then your choices can be defined in a way that will allow you to choose the best course of action. I know everyone has their coping mechanisms but for me its always been A or B, BLACK or WHITE, RIGHT or WRONG, I don't live in shades of grey I don't run from myself and I don't lie to myself or others. I also may know that you are a liar but unless provoked and serving some higher purpose I won't call you on it. I like to be entertained just like the next person and there is nothing more entertaining then a liar but I also know if you lie you will cheat and if you will cheat you will steal those kinds of people are held at arms length and watched with a careful eye.  I know way to many liars, cheaters, thieves, and people who are in denial about their lives in general. Someone has to be the one to stand on the side of truth with some kind of moral compass if no one does that then we lose sight of what's real and get swept up into a stream of epic crooked proportions and what not. Living in fantasy is not something I intend on doing so maybe I was set amongst these types to be a sort of lighthouse so if they ever get to far gone and need a way to get home then they can head towards the beam of truth and the rocky shores of morality, not saying I'm perfect but I tend to stay on the right side more often than not, and I always keep in mind that the good book says you should treat others as you wish to be treated with that firmly resounding in my head how could your or I do anything other than just that and why wouldn't you want to?