BROKEN SOUL AGREEMENT

I understand that this was made up as a joke but...some of y'all are totally following these rules lol.

This pre-booty call agreement (hereinafter referred to as the "Agreement") is entered into on the _____day of __________, 2007, by_______________________, between ____________and______________.


THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULES AND PRINCIPLES:

1. No sleeping over - unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.

2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.

3. No calls before 9 PM - we don't have shit to talk about.

4. None of that "lovemaking" shit - only sex allowed.

5. No emotional discussions (i.e. Where are we heading with this? Do you love me?) The
answer is no, so don't ask.

6. No plans made in advance - that is why you are called the "backup," unless you are from
out-of-town, then it's only a one-time advanced arrangement.

7. All gifts accepted - money is always good.

8. No baby talk - however, dirty talk is encouraged.

9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers - it's really none of your damn business.

10. No calling each other "friends with privileges" we are not friends, just sex buddies.

11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is OK - don't be offended.

12. No extra clothing - I don't want your ass leaving anything behind when you leave.

13. No falling asleep right after sex - it's over, so get your ass up, get dressed and go the fuck home.

14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it - I don't care.

15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.

16. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: "My roommate's
girlfriend/boyfriend."

17. Doggie style is the preferred position - the reason is less eye contact the better.

19. No condoms, no fucking. Carry your ass home.

20. Bring your own drink - I am not your liquor store.

21. No phone use, please - don't want anyone calling back looking for your ass.


* EXTRA TIP FOR SUCCESSFUL BOOTY CALLS:

The aforementioned rules may only be altered by the holder of the agreement. If the other party attempts to change or alter any terms of this Agreement, it will automatically become null and void and you will then be removed from the BOOTY CALL LIST and deleted from phone memory and email list. In other words, you will be BLOCKED from all communications until your silly ass understands the rules.


Participating Party

Signature_______________________________________
Date: ________________

Participating Party

Signature_______________________________________
Date: ________________

In this day and age isn't this what relationships between the opposite sexes has become? I find myself more and more sucker punching a guy with the "If you're looking for sex miss me with that" Deal breaker before he can even get it out of his mouth. I don't want, need, or like casual sex; it makes my skin crawl and my emotions protest. I would rather fly solo then engage in a bedroom romp with some dude I haven't known longer than my current sneaker. It's ridiculous how love has gotten lost in translation and sex has become the ultimate filler for all things remotely relationship like. I envy the people who have been able to wade through all of the broken and trifling individuals in this society to truly find someone who compliments them and who wants nothing but the best for that person in essence a real relationship with another individual that wants you in total not just your sex organs. I am so tired of interviewing frogs in the effort and hope of finding someone who will get me and no I don't believe I need to sleep with every individual that shows me some interest my self esteem is just not that low. Sigh, those who have managed to find a love that shelters their heart I envy you. It is a rare bird true love it's elusive and skittish, it can only be coaxed into the hand with finesse and tenderness not with the crass coochie-cooing of random sex acts that leave one broken, misused, and damaged. Sigh we have a generation of people who are living artificially existing on a diet of lies and polluted perceptions of how life and love should be. My inner-self cries for children who will be brought up to think that love is a dirty word and sex is the replaced it. Love is not the enemy it is the mistreatment of it that is the enemy yes it is a complete and total emotion that can take you as high as heaven or as low as hell but its an emotion that is worth seeking, having, and keeping.

Husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it .. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.
~ by The Holy Bible, New International Version Ephesians 5:25-33 ~

Tags: relationships | Edit Tags

ORIGINA POST DATE:
Saturday April 21, 2007 - 11:58pm Read more...

BACK IN THE DAY'S WHEN I WAS YOUNG....

Since My blog on yahoo 360 is going to be deleted as they are making the new profiles top 1 priority I have decided that I am going to repost the best of my 360 blogs over here so yep here goes.

Obviously this is my favorite video I stay posting it, lol.


You're a 90's kid if:



You can finish this [ice ice _ _ _ _ ]

You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...

AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"

You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."

You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early
on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

You remember reading "Goosebumps"

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.

You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not

If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.

when everyhting was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.



You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.

"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.

Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.

You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genesis became popular.

You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.

You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"

You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.

You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.

You remember those Where's Waldo books.

You remember eating Warheads.

You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.

You remember Ring Pops.

You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.


If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"

When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.


You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.

Making those little paper fortune cookie things, and then predicting your life with them.

You played and/or collected "Pogs"

You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.

. . . Furbies.

Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!

You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.

And Windows 95 was the best.

You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.

Michael Jordan was a king.


YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!

All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.

You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.

You collected those Beanie Babies.

Mortal Kombat was awesome--the game and the movie

Carebears

Gak was the coolest stuff invented.

Lambchop's song never ended.

The old dollar bills.

Silver dollars, which were cool to have.

You remember a time before the WB.

You collected all the Troll dolls

You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.

If you even know what an original walkman is.

You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.

You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

You know the Macarena by heart.

"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said

You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"

You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!

You remember Highlight's magazine.

You know the significance of the number 23.

You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace (and it was outside).

You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.

Before the MySpace frenzy . . .

Before the Internet & text messaging . . .

Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .

Before MIKE JONES . . .

Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .

Before Spongebob . . .

Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.

When light up sneakers were cool.


When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.

When gas was $0.78 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.

When we recorded stuff on VCRs.

When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.

When gameboy was a brick.

You did MASH to figure out your future

When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.

Way back.

Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.

Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!!!!

Post this in your bulletin if you remember these days . . . .

or if you smiled at one of these thing. . .

Post with the year you were born in...

And just because I'm fresh lol I will throw in a way back candy link where you can still order the candy from your favorite era how damn cool am I?????

I'LL TAKE YOU TO THE CANDY SHOP, CLICK ME Read more...