AN OPEN LETTER TO TASIA BARRINO

Read more...

READ THE VOWS BEFORE YOU WALK DOWN THAT AISLE

The last post got me to thinking and thinking deeply it even made me look up some marriage vows. I don't think people even know what they are agreeing too when they get married. Especially since they might be hearing the vows for the very first time when they are standing in front of the alter. All that hoopla of a wedding and the most important piece, the vows is often the most ignored. So in efforts to save someone to really put something on a person's heart, mind and soul, before you walk down that aisle, invest in that dress, rent that tux, book the church, and get the marriage certificate read these marriage vows and let it marinate in your mind, allow it to wash over you and allow yourself to meditate on the words, the meaning of the words, and the connotation of said words. As one of my very good friends would say, "this is not a game people this is real life." We don't get to do dress rehearsals in life once you set it in motion it will happen and it becomes real! Without further preamble I give you Traditional Wedding Vows:

VOWS PROVIDED BY THE WEBSITE WEDDING PLANNING LINKS

MINISTER:

Dearly Beloved, we are gathered together here in the sign of God – and in the face of this company – to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony, which is commended to be honorable among all men; and therefore – is not by any – to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly – but reverently, discreetly, advisedly and solemnly. Into this holy estate these two persons present now come to be joined. If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together – let them speak now or forever hold their peace.

Marriage is the union of husband and wife in heart, body and mind. It is intended for their mutual joy – and for the help and comfort given on another in prosperity and adversity. But more importantly – it is a means through which a stable and loving environment may be attained.

Through marriage, GROOM'S NAME and BRIDE'S NAME make a commitment together to face their disappointments – embrace their dreams – realize their hopes – and accept each other’s failures. GROOM'S NAME and BRIDE'S NAME will promise one another to aspire to these ideals throughout their lives together – through mutual understanding – openness – and sensitivity to each other.

We are here today – before God – because marriage is one of His most sacred wishes – to witness the joining in marriage of GROOM'S NAME and BRIDE'S NAME. This occasion marks the celebration of love and commitment with which this man and this woman begin their life together. And now – through me – He joins you together in one of the holiest bonds.

Who gives this woman in marriage to this man?


BRIDE’S FATHER OR ESCORT:

Her family and friends gathered here today do.


MINISTER:

This is a beginning and a continuation of their growth as individuals. With mutual care, respect, responsibility and knowledge comes the affirmation of each one’s own life happiness, growth and freedom. With respect for individual boundaries comes the freedom to love unconditionally. Within the emotional safety of a loving relationship – the knowledge self-offered one another becomes the fertile soil for continued growth. With care and responsibility towards self and one another comes the potential for full and happy lives.

By gathering together all the wishes of happiness and our fondest hopes for GROOM'S NAME and BRIDE'S NAME from all present here, we assure them that our hearts are in tune with theirs. These moments are so meaningful to all of us, for “what greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined together – to strengthen each other in all labor – to minister to each other in all sorrow – to share with each other in all gladness.

This relationship stands for love, loyalty, honesty and trust, but most of all for friendship. Before they knew love, they were friends, and it was from this seed of friendship that is their destiny. Do not think that you can direct the course of love – for love, if it finds you worthy, shall direct you.

Marriage is an act of faith and a personal commitment as well as a moral and physical union between two people. Marriage has been described as the best and most important relationship that can exist between them. It is the construction of their love and trust into a single growing energy of spiritual life. It is amoral commitment that requires and deserves daily attention. Marriage should be a life long consecration of the ideal of loving kindness – backed with the will to make it last.


Exchange of Vows


MINISTER TO GROOM:

Do you GROOM'S NAME take BRIDE'S NAME to be your wife – to live together after God’s ordinance – in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon her your heart’s deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her as long as you both shall live?


GROOM:

I will.


MINISTER TO BRIDE:

Do you BRIDE'S NAME) take GROOM'S NAME to be your husband – to live together after God’s ordinance – in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon him your heart’s deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto him as long as you both shall live?


BRIDE:

I will.


Exchange of Wedding Rings

MINISTER:

What token of your love do you offer? Would you place the ring(s) in my hand?

May this/these ring(s) be blessed as the symbol of this affectionate unity. These two lives are now joined in one unbroken circle. Wherever they go – may they always return to one another. May these two find in each other the love for which all men and women year. May they grow in understanding and in compassion. May the home which they establish together be such a place that many will find there a friend. May this/these ring(s) on her/their finger(s) symbolize the touch of the spirit of love in their hearts.


Handing ring to the Groom


MINISTER TO GROOM:

GROOM'S NAME, in placing this ring on BRIDE'S NAME finger, repeat after me: BRIDE'S NAME), you are now consecrated to me as my wife from this day forward and I give you this ring as the pledge of my love and as the symbol of our unity and with this ring, I thee wed.



Handing ring to the Bride


MINISTER TO BRIDE:

BRIDE'S NAME, in placing this ring on GROOM'S NAME finger, repeat after me: GROOM'S NAME, you are now consecrate to me as my husband from this day forward and I give you this ring as the pledge of my love and as the symbol of our unity and with this ring, I thee wed.


Pronouncement


MINISTER:

May you always share with each other the gifts of love – be one in heart and in mind – may you always create a home together that puts in your hearts – love – generosity and kindness.

In as much as GROOM'S NAME and BRIDE'S NAME have consented together in marriage before this company of friends and family and have pledged their faith – and declared their unity by giving and receiving a ring – are now joined.

You have pronounced yourselves husband and wife but remember to always be each other’s best friend.

What – therefore – God has joined together – let no man put asunder.

And so, by the power vested in me by the State of ______ and Almighty God, I now pronounce you man and wife – and may your days be good and long upon the earth.

You may now kiss the bride.

Read more...

PRIMING THE PUMP, GETTING THE HEART TO BEAT

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."
--Lao Tzu

If he is the first thing you think of when you wake up,
the only thing you think of when you're awake,
and the last thing you think of before you go to bed,
then he is really somebody special.

" Our love must not be a thing of words and fine talk. It must be a thing of action and sincerity. "
~ I John 3:18

As a Rose absorbs the nutrients it feeds on and as it thrives to see the sun as it must to survive...... the Rose becomes more beautiful and in turn will provide sunshine to those who can behold it's beauty. Fortunate is the Man who can see the Rose within a Woman. Blessed is the man who this Woman holds to be her nutrient, her sunshine.
Art Denton



Immature love says "I love you because I need you." Mature love says "I need you because I love you."
- Erich Fromm

A woman who does not trust love will never know the exquisite security of giving herself.
~Maya Angelou

"The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother."
Theodore M Hesburgh

"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."
James Baldwin



Love is strong yet delicate.It can be broken.To truly love is to understand this.To be in love is to respect this.
Stephen Packer

All our young lives we search for someone to love, someone who makes us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope, all the while wondering if somewhere and somehow there is someone searching for us.
The Wonder Years

I have learned not to worry about love; But to honor its coming with all my heart.
Alice Walker

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom. Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never ever the same.
Flavia Weedn

Between husband and wife there should be no secrets from one another. I have a very high opinion of the marriage tie. I hold that husband and wife merge in each other. They are one in two or two in one.
Mahatma Gandhi

Read more...

5 DANGEROUS AND FRADULENT HEALTH FADS YOU SHOULD AVOID

By Greg A. Miller, The Faster Times. Posted August 4, 2009 ORIGINAL ARTICLE SOURCE

This article was reprinted from The Faster Times. Faster. Smarter. Funnier: Go to TheFasterTimes.com for the latest in News, Politics, Science, Arts, Health, Nonsense, and everything else.

In Gregg A. Miller's recent article, he discussed how a recent study of skinny monkeys doesn’t provide convincing evidence to switch to a restricted-calorie diet. Here are five more health fads he suggests you should avoid.


Colonics or Enemas: Your car’s various systems need a flush. Your colon does not. Don’t get me wrong, enemas do have a role in improving people’s health, particularly in people with acute constipation. However, the concept that toxic sludge builds up along the lining of your colon, until a coffee, saltwater, or milk and molassas enema finally flushes it out, is completely wrong. There is no scientific evidence of any benefit from routine enemas, and there are many cases of ruptured colons and rectums as a result of enemas gone wrong. There are much better ways to get a caffeine high than injecting coffee the wrong way up your intestines.


Master Cleanse Detoxification Diet: After centuries of experience with it, you’d think that humans would support the concept of eating. Both common sense and scientific research agree: food, in general, is a good thing. So it’s baffling why someone might think that imbibing nothing but water mixed with lemon juice, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper for weeks on end is a good idea. But Stanley Burroughs, a man who was convicted of practicing medicine without a license and charged with murder, advocated just that with the Master Cleanse Diet. This regimen completely ignores basic science: if your kidneys and liver can’t detoxify you, some cayenne peppers and lemons aren’t going to help. In fact, this diet might lead to dangerous electrolyte imbalances and a build up of acid inside the bloodstream. Your kidney and liver will detoxify your body just fine, as long as you give them the nutrition they need. (I would just like to point out that I told you dizzy ass mofo's so when everyone was running around here swearing up and down that the "master cleanse" was the way to go. All because SWSNBN did that shit for a movie and had you dizzy ass broads, and some men walking around sipping on a disgusting concoction of lemon water, cayenne pepper, and some maple syrup. Next time listen to me when I tell you stop doing everything these mofos in hollyweird do while these jackasses have the money to replace their body parts the average person doesn't stop letting the wig crypt keeper and her people make you dance like puppets on a damn string silly mofos)

Skipping vaccines: When it comes to your child’s well-being, who should you take advice from: the American Academy of Pediatrics, an association dedicated to researching and protecting children’s health, or a celebrity famous for posing nude in adult magazines? For some Americans, apparently this is a difficult question to answer correctly. Vaccines do not cause autism. On the other hand, measles, rubella, and H. influenza, to name just a few vaccine-preventable illnesses, can indeed cause serious brain damage and even death. What’s more, skipping vaccines doesn’t just affect individual health, it impacts the entire community. Once enough unvaccinated hosts are present in a population, the disease can spread to people who did receive the vaccine. Skip the advice from the centerfolds, focus on what a boring, unsexy group of doctors and scientists recommend.


Magnets for Muscle and Joint Pain: Unlike the others on this list, this health fad probably won’t hurt you. On the other hand, it probably won’t help either. High-quality scientific studies do not show any benefit beyond a placebo effect from putting magnets over painful joints or muscles. The only difference you’ll notice between a magnet and a regular hunk of metal is how much lighter your wallet is. The magnetic therapy industry is booming, with annual worldwide sales at $5 billion. Take that money you were going to spend on magnets and buy a more comfortable pair of shoes, some over the counter pain killers, or a joint brace.


Executive Physicals and Screening CTs: Many health care organizations market the “Executive Physical,” a thorough medical consultation with extensive testing including bloodwork, screening CT scans, and even some fancy slippers and a bathrobe to wear during the exam. Much of this is useful, including the slippers. However, you should be aware of the radiation risk with CT scans. Though CTs are useful for sick patients, the benefit of bombarding a healthy patient with radiation during a routine physical exam is questionable. Some experts estimate that about one or two of every hundred cancers in the US are due to radiation exposure from medical studies. Until more evidence is in, think carefully before getting a screening CT, and avoid routine annual CT scans.

This article first appeared in The Faster Times.

Gregg Miller, MD is a board-certified emergency room physician. Not nearly as good-looking as the doctors on the TV show ER, lacking the charisma of Dr. House, and much less scandalous than anyone on Grey’s Anatomy, he still managed to carve out a niche practicing medicine in California’s emergency departments. After several years in the US he moved to China, where he currently works. Read more...

HUMAN PAPILLOMAVIRUS (HPV)

ALL FACTS ARE DIRECTLY FROM THE CDC WEBSITE WHICH IS LOCATED HERE I AM NOT THE AUTHOR OF ANY OF THESE FACTS I AM JUST THE MESSENGER! ALL THE SOURCES FOR THE MATERIAL ARE ON THE CDC PAGE PLEASE REFER TO THEM FOR YOUR OWN REFERENCE.



WHAT IS HPV?
Genital human papillomavirus (HPV) is the most common sexually transmitted infection (STI). The virus infects the skin and mucous membranes. There are more than 40 HPV types that can infect the genital areas of men and women, including the skin of the penis, vulva (area outside the vagina), and anus, and the linings of the vagina, cervix, and rectum. You cannot see HPV. Most people who become infected with HPV do not even know they have it.

SYMPTOMS AND POTENTIAL HEALTH CONSEQUENCES
Most people with HPV do not develop symptoms or health problems. But sometimes, certain types of HPV can cause genital warts in men and women. Other HPV types can cause cervical cancer and other less common cancers, such as cancers of the vulva, vagina, anus, and penis. The types of HPV that can cause genital warts are not the same as the types that can cause cancer.

HPV types are often referred to as “low-risk” (wart-causing) or “high-risk” (cancer-causing), based on whether they put a person at risk for cancer. In 90% of cases, the body’s immune system clears the HPV infection naturally within two years. This is true of both high-risk and low-risk types.

Genital warts usually appear as small bumps or groups of bumps, usually in the genital area. They can be raised or flat, single or multiple, small or large, and sometimes cauliflower shaped. They can appear on the vulva, in or around the vagina or anus, on the cervix, and on the penis, scrotum, groin, or thigh. Warts may appear within weeks or months after sexual contact with an infected person. Or, they may not appear at all. If left untreated, genital warts may go away, remain unchanged, or increase in size or number. They will not turn into cancer.

Cervical cancer does not have symptoms until it is quite advanced. For this reason, it is important for women to get screened regularly for cervical cancer.


Other less common HPV-related cancers, such as cancers of the vulva, vagina, anus and penis, also may not have signs or symptoms until they are advanced.

HOW DO PEOPLE GET GET GENITAL HPV INFECTIONS
Genital HPV is passed on through genital contact, most often during vaginal and anal sex. A person can have HPV even if years have passed since he or she had sex. Most infected persons do not realize they are infected or that they are passing the virus to a sex partner.

Very rarely, a pregnant woman with genital HPV can pass HPV to her baby during vaginal delivery. In these cases, the child may develop warts in the throat or voice box – a condition called recurrent respiratory papillomatosis (RRP).

HOW DOES HPV CAUSE GENITAL WARTS AND CANCER?
HPV can cause normal cells on infected skin or mucous membranes to turn abnormal. Most of the time, you cannot see or feel these cell changes. In most cases, the body fights off HPV naturally and the infected cells then go back to normal.

*Sometimes, low-risk types of HPV can cause visible changes that take the form of genital warts.

* If a high-risk HPV infection is not cleared by the immune system, it can linger for many years and turn abnormal cells into cancer over time. About 10% of women with high-risk HPV on their cervix will develop long-lasting HPV infections that put them at risk for cervical cancer. Similarly, when high-risk HPV lingers and infects the cells of the penis, anus, vulva, or vagina, it can cause cancer in those areas. But these cancers are much less common than cervical cancer.

HOW COMMON ARE HPV AND RELATED DISEASES?
HPV infection. Approximately 20 million Americans are currently infected with HPV, and another 6.2 million people become newly infected each year. At least 50% of sexually active men and women acquire genital HPV infection at some point in their lives.

Genital warts. About 1% of sexually active adults in the U.S. have genital warts at any one time.

Cervical cancer. The American Cancer Society estimates that in 2008, 11,070 women will be diagnosed with cervical cancer in the U.S.

Other HPV-related cancers are much less common than cervical cancer. The American Cancer Society estimates that in 2008, there will be:

* 3,460 women diagnosed with vulvar cancer;
* 2,210 women diagnosed with vaginal and other female genital cancers;
* 1,250 men diagnosed with penile and other male genital cancers; and
* 3,050 women and 2,020 men diagnosed with anal cancer.

Certain populations may be at higher risk for HPV-related cancers, such as gay and bisexual men, and individuals with weak immune systems (including those who have HIV/AIDS).

RRP is very rare. It is estimated that less than 2,000 children get RRP every year.

HOW CAN PEOPLE PREVENT HPV?
A vaccine can now protect females from the four types of HPV that cause most cervical cancers and genital warts. The vaccine is recommended for 11 and 12 year-old girls. It is also recommended for girls and women age 13 through 26 who have not yet been vaccinated or completed the vaccine series.

For those who choose to be sexually active, condoms may lower the risk of HPV, if used all the time and the right way. Condoms may also lower the risk of developing HPV-related diseases, such as genital warts and cervical cancer. But HPV can infect areas that are not covered by a condom—so condoms may not fully protect against HPV. So the only sure way to prevent HPV is to avoid all sexual activity.

Individuals can also lower their chances of getting HPV by being in a mutually faithful relationship with someone who has had no or few sex partners. However, even people with only one lifetime sex partner can get HPV, if their partner was infected with HPV. For those who are not in long-term mutually monogamous relationships, limiting the number of sex partners and choosing a partner less likely to be infected may lower the risk of HPV. Partners less likely to be infected include those who have had no or few prior sex partners. But it may not be possible to determine if a partner who has been sexually active in the past is currently infected.

HOW CAN PEOPLE PREVENT HPV-RELATED DISEASES?
There are important steps girls and women can take to prevent cervical cancer. The HPV vaccine can protect against most cervical cancers (see above). Cervical cancer can also be prevented with routine cervical cancer screening and follow-up of abnormal results. The Pap test can identify abnormal or pre-cancerous changes in the cervix so that they can be removed before cancer develops. An HPV DNA test, which can find high-risk HPV on a woman’s cervix, may also be used with a Pap test in certain cases. The HPV test can help healthcare professionals decide if more tests or treatment are needed. Even women who got the vaccine when they were younger need regular cervical cancer screening because the vaccine does not protect against all cervical cancers.

There is currently no vaccine licensed to prevent HPV-related diseases in men. Studies are now being done to find out if the vaccine is also safe in men, and if it can protect them against HPV and related conditions. The FDA will consider licensing the vaccine for boys and men if there is proof that it is safe and effective for them. There is also no approved screening test to find early signs of penile or anal cancer. Some experts recommend yearly anal Pap tests for gay and bisexual men and for HIV-positive persons because anal cancer is more common in these populations. Scientists are still studying how best to screen for penile and anal cancers in those who may be at highest risk for those diseases.

Generally, cesarean delivery is not recommended for women with genital warts to prevent RRP in their babies. This is because it is unclear whether cesarean delivery actually prevents RRP in infants and children.

IS THERE A TEST FOR HPV?
The HPV test on the market is only used as part of cervical cancer screening. There is no general test for men or women to check one’s overall “HPV status.” HPV usually goes away on its own, without causing health problems. So an HPV infection that is found today will most likely not be there a year or two from now. For this reason, there is no need to be tested just to find out if you have HPV now. However, you should get tested for signs of disease that HPV can cause, such as cervical cancer.

*Genital warts are diagnosed by visual inspection. Some health care providers may use acetic acid, a vinegar solution, to help identify flat warts. But this is not a sensitive test so it may wrongly identify normal skin as a wart.
*Cervical cell changes (early signs of cervical cancer) can be identified by routine Pap tests. The HPV test can identify high-risk HPV types on a woman’s cervix, which can cause cervical cell changes and cancer.
* As noted above, there is currently no approved test to find HPV or related cancers in men. But HPV is very common and HPV-related cancers are very rare in men.

IS THERE A TREATMENT FOR HPV?
There is no treatment for the virus itself, but a healthy immune system can usually fight off HPV naturally. There are treatments for the diseases that HPV can cause:

Visible genital warts can be removed by patient-applied medications, or by treatments performed by a health care provider. Some individuals choose to forego treatment to see if the warts will disappear on their own. No one treatment is better than another.

Cervical cancer is most treatable when it is diagnosed and treated early. There are new forms of surgery, radiation therapy, and chemotherapy available for patients [see www.cancer.org Please see disclaimer at bottom of this page.]. But women who get routine Pap testing and follow up as needed can identify problems before cancer develops. Prevention is always better than treatment.

Other HPV-related cancers are also more treatable when diagnosed and treated early. There are new forms of surgery, radiation therapy, and chemotherapy available for patients. [see www.cancer.org Please see disclaimer at bottom of this page.] Read more...

SEXUAL HEALTH 101: DENTAL DAMS

A LINK FOR ALL YOUR CONDOM NEEDS

The Dental Dam


What is a dental dam?
A dental dam is basically a small sheet of latex which acts as a barrier between the vagina or anus and the mouth. Dental dams get their name because they are used during dental surgery such as root canals. Due to the possible infectious secretions from both the vagina and anus, the dental dam is becoming a more popular safer sex tool. With the introduction of different colors, shapes and sizes, manufacturers are adding some exciting changes to what once was sterile translucent-white latex.


How effective are dental dams?
Dental dams are an extremely effective means of preventing infection from vaginal or anal secretions. There is little data available on rates of infection after use of the dental dam. There are a few important concerns which may reduce the effectiveness of the barrier. Before you use the dam, lightly rinse it off with warm water. Dry with a towel. Then check to be sure the dam is free of holes or breakage. You can check the dam before you use it by holding it up to light or seeing if water is able to pass through it. Finally, ensure that only one side of the dam comes in contact with the genitals, and that the dam is used only once. Otherwise you are defeating the whole purpose of using the dam in the first place.

Only use water based lubricants (we recommend Astroglide) when using dental dams.


How do you use dental dams?
Dental dams are not the most difficult piece of protection to use. Some people prefer that the person performing oral sex should hold the dam so that the receiver can just sit back and relax. Others think that the receiver should hold the dam so the other partner has his/her hands free for other stimulation. As an alternative, some dental dams are now made with an adhesive strip which will hold the dam in place. Remember to use some water based lubricant on the vagina or anus beforehand to increase the amount of stimulation received.


Practical concerns with dental dams
People often approach dental dams with the fear that the normally intense stimulation of the tongue will be lessened by the sheet of latex. The feeling of a dental dam is different than the feeling of a tongue but it does not necessarily make it a bad thing. Use plenty of water based lubricant and one partner can play with the latex in his/her mouth to provide their partner with a new type of stimulation. The use of a dam is up to you. Oral sex is considered to be less dangerous a practice than intercourse, and fellatio is often less dangerous than oral-anal sex. The level of protection you decide to use is your choice, but the safest sex dictates you use a dental dam at all times. Read more...

DUB ME YOUR SEXUAL HEALTH FAIRY GOODMOTHER

Just about everyone is having sex but from the cases of diseases and unplanned pregnancies some of you rocket scientist know nothing about protecting yourselves so since I am one of many who is all for SAFE SEX, or NO SEX AT ALL aka celibacy or abstinence I thought I would bring the masses a safe sex series. Since y'all won't and can't seem to save nor protect yourselves. I also want to say stop being lazy, trifling, and nasty when it comes to sex. Way to many treat it like a recreational sport and its killing you. So get ready for the sexual health updates kids, adults, pervs, and everyone else. You may now dub me as your fairy GoodMother and yes I spelled it that way for a reason. Read more...