Friday, September 25, 2009

PENIS ON PARADE





Dear Men,

Hey guys let me talk to you for a minute about this very important topic that should be addressed. I have let it slide far to long because way too many of y'all are doing it and I know some BASIC BITCH's have convinced y'all that the shit is cute but I am here to tell you this shit needs to stop or it just needs to stop happening to me that's for damn sure.

STOP SENDING YOUR MOTHAFUCKING PENIS THROUGH THE NET AND THROUGH PICTURE MAIL ON CELLPHONES. First and foremost unless your penis is immaculate and just beautiful like a work of art penis is not that impressive looking in general. Now some chicks get off on looking at different penises but some don't I happen to not be one of those chicks that need to be sent penis through any types of electronic means yet and still I always get the penis pictures. There is a time and a place to disclose your penis and for goodness sakes ask first it's only polite.

You would think that since men's fragile egos are tied directly to their penis they wouldn't be so eager to give anyone an opening to attack it. But some of y'all are slow mentally obviously since you sending penis through electronic means and you proud of your man sausages like you did something special. Like you want extra life credit for growing your penis or something. So be forewarned that if you send your penis to me electronically and expect me to be excited, aroused, or overjoyed then you will most likely be disappointed. I will more than likely say something unkind about your penis and possibly cause your self esteem to crumble and give you doubts that you could even work the middle and that up until you sent your penis electronically to me you were simply getting pity coochie. I will do my best to make you feel under endowed as well but most of y'all don't need my help in that department especially when you working with less than a size 8. If your penis is less than impressive in length I will not lie to you nor spare your feelings.

So men this is your forewarning before you send your penis through electronic means make sure its impressive and something to really see, also please ask and inform before you just send. Some women don't like surprises I for one am one of those women who would rather have the option to say no versus just being underwhelmed by unimpressive man meat. So spread the word near and far men stop sending out your penis without being invited to do so, I know that sending penis electronically is the new IN but trust me like tight skinny jeans its not for everybody!